14 Behaviors That Build Trust | Trust Pt. 3

Trust is built by consistent, dependable behavior. Author Stephen Covey likens relationships to “trust accounts where we deposit, or withdraw trust by our actions and words. The first five behaviors are character-based; the second five are competence based; and the last three are a combination of both. What follows is based on his list but I have added my own explanation plus number 14 is the most important of all so be sure to read to the end of the list.

CHARACTER BEHAVIORS

1. TALK STRAIGHT
   Be honest. Tell the truth. Let people know where you stand. Don’t hide your feelings. Use simple language. Call things what they are. Don’t manipulate people nor distort facts.

2. DEMONSTRATE RESPECT
   Genuinely care for others. Show you care. Respect the dignity of every person and every role. Treat everyone with respect, especially those who can’t do anything for you. Value those relationships you have and don’t take them for granted. Even during very busy periods, it’s possible to find a little time for those who matter most.

3. CREATE TRANSPARENCY
   Get real and genuine. Be open and authentic. Err on the side of disclosure. Operate on the premise of, “What you see is what you get.” Don’t have hidden agendas. In some cultures, it is difficult to be honest or transparent with a leader or even to disagree for fear of offending the leader. This is not healthy.

4. RIGHT WRONGS
   Always admit your mistakes and apologize quickly. Make things right when you’re wrong and make restitution where possible. Don’t cover things up. Don’t let personal pride get in the way of doing the right thing.

5. SHOW LOYALTY
   Give credit to others. Speak about people as if they were present. If you are on a team, you are there to contribute so develop your team skills and participate openly. Don’t always promote yourself. Recognize and appreciate the efforts of others.

6. DELIVER RESULTS
   Establish a track record of results. Get the things done. Make things happen. Don’t be late & don’t go over budget. Don’t overpromise & under deliver. Don’t allow yourself to give excuses.

7. GET BETTER
   Continuously improve and increase your capabilities. Be a constant learner. Don’t consider yourself above feedback, but ask for it and then take it seriously.

8. CONFRONT REALITY
   Take issues head on, even things others may not want to discuss. Acknowledge the unsaid.

9. CLARIFY EXPECTATIONS
   Disclose and reveal expectations. Discuss them. Don’t assume that expectations are clear or shared.

10. PRACTICE ACCOUNTABILITY
    Hold yourself accountable. Hold others accountable. Take responsibility for results. Don’t blame others or point fingers when things go wrong.

11. LISTEN FIRST
    Listen before you speak. Understand before you speak. Listen with your ears, and your eyes, and your heart. Don’t assume you know what matters most to others. Don’t presume you have the answer.

12. KEEP COMMITMENTS
    Say what you’re going to do. Then do what you said you’re going to do.

13. EXTEND TRUST
    Demonstrate a heart to trust others. Don’t withhold trust because there is risk involved.

14. KNOW WHO YOU ARE: 
    A son or daughter of God, a prince or princess who is part of the royal family, and an heir to the Kingdom along with the others in the family. There is plenty for everyone. There is no need for competition or protectionism. We do not need to be defensive and cautious and distrusting. We belong to Him and He cares for us and will protect us and heal us if hurt.

If you are just now dropping into Barry’s series on Trust, read Part 1 , The Importance of Trust, and Part 2, A Creed for High Trust Relationships, by clicking the links.